Choosing Family: A Journey of Prioritizing Well-Being Over Work

As I begin to compose this letter, my heart is a mixture of gratitude and a touch of sadness Since its inception in 2021, Grit & Grace Psychotherapy has been more than just a professional endeavor for me; it has been a profound journey of personal growth, meaningful connections, and unwavering hope. My name is Kayla, and I am the founder and owner of Grit & Grace Psychotherapy.

When I initially established Grit & Grace, it was never my intention for it to evolve into a group therapy practice. However, within just two months, it became glaringly apparent how great the demand for EMDR Therapy was in our community. Referrals poured in, overwhelming me with the sheer volume of need. Within four months of launching, I made the decision to hire my first four therapists, and three months later, an additional three joined our team. My ambition was to continuously expand our services and offer the highest quality trauma therapy, delivered by therapists who authentically embodied themselves.

Then, in November 2023, my partner and I received unexpected news: we were expecting a baby. This revelation hit me like a ton of bricks, as it was not part of my envisioned plan. I had aspirations of accomplishing more, experiencing more, and dedicating more time to self-improvement. However, life had other plans in store. I confided in my partner, expressing my fears of losing my identity as a mother and the pressure to maintain my professional commitments. His unwavering support and reassurance became my anchor during this tumultuous period.

Throughout my pregnancy, I grappled with intense emotions and fears, seeking solace in sessions with my EMDR Therapist. Together, we addressed negative core beliefs surrounding motherhood and confronted my profound anxieties regarding childbirth. Even during what was supposed to be my "maternity leave," I found myself unable to fully detach from the responsibilities of running the practice. Balancing breastfeeding, diaper changes, and business operations became an overwhelming juggling act. Despite my best efforts, the relentless influx of referrals demanded my attention, blurring the boundaries between work and motherhood.

During the initial eight weeks, while my partner was by my side, I managed to navigate the multiple roles of a new mother, business owner, and partner. However, once he returned to work, the weight of responsibility bore down on me like never before. The guilt and shame of wishing for moments of respite clashed with the relentless demands of both motherhood and professional obligations. My mental health deteriorated as I struggled to reconcile these conflicting roles, slipping further into a state of emotional turmoil.

Eventually, I reached a pivotal realization: I could no longer sustain this unsustainable balance, nor did I want to compromise my values. With the unwavering support of my partner, therapist, and cousin, the decision to close the practice became inevitable. Despite the facade of competence and composure I presented to the world, only my partner truly understood the extent of my suffering and the tears shed behind closed doors. I took pride in my ability to juggle multiple responsibilities with a smile, but I came to realize that this facade masked a deep well of pain. Accepting my limitations was an act of bravery, not weakness.

Last week, as I signed the lease for a smaller office. I reflected on the profound significance of choosing family over work. I articulated to my partner a sentiment that encapsulated this shift in priorities: "I am proud to prioritize our family over career aspirations, knowing that I will never regret this decision, especially when our daughter is older." This conversation marked a turning point for me, knowing that I had done the right thing for myself. 

The overwhelming outpouring of love, support, and gratitude from my colleagues reaffirmed the impact of our shared journey. I share this deeply personal experience with the understanding that, as therapists, we are often encouraged to maintain strict boundaries between our professional and personal lives. However, by sharing my story, I hope to inspire others to embrace vulnerability and prioritize their well-being, even if it means deviating from societal norms.

As this transition unfolds, I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to each client, colleague, and supporter who has been a part of our journey. While the doors of Grit & Grace Psychotherapy will close on May 24th as I group practice, I will continue to offer EMDR weekly therapy and EMDR intensives, remaining committed to supporting those in need.

With deepest appreciation and warm regards,

Kayla
Founder & Owner
Grit & Grace Psychotherapy